A Templeton Finn Coaching Article:

TIME MANAGEMENT - TRAINING YOURSELF TO DO THE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO

You know a lot of things you should be doing to progress your career (as well as to be healthy, fit and slim). So how come you're not doing them? You get home at the end of each day having done the same old stuff. It all feels urgent and compelling at the time but you still haven't done the things that really contribute to your or your firm's long term success.

So, why does this happen every day?

Our behaviour is dictated by pleasure and pain. In simple terms, we do things which we think will give us pleasure and avoid things which we think will give us pain. A cream bun now can be more compelling than the slim body of the future.

"A cream bun now can be more compelling than the slim body of the future!"

We are strongly motivated by pleasure that is immediate and certain. So, we do things that give immediate, certain, positive consequences rather than long term uncertain consequences. For example, the prospect of being slim and fit is nice but it takes a while and somehow the cream bun in front of your face is more compelling.

People and organisations don't follow basic behavioural principles

What happens before a behaviour (an antecedent) tends to cause it to happen once. What happens after a behaviour (reinforcement) determines whether the behaviour will be repeated.

Organisations and individuals tend to rely mainly on antecedents (ranging from simply telling other people or themselves what to do right up to engaging in "vision and values" projects).

They rely less on reinforcement (ensuring the desired action has a positive consequence).

To manage yourself (or others) well, your long term best interests should define the behaviours for which you get positive or negative reinforcement in the short term.

Some people are good at this without even knowing what they're doing

Some people feel good when they take actions in line with their long term goals and values. Effective people are able to manipulate their thoughts and feelings to get positive reinforcement for things which are genuinely positive for them in the long term (commonly known as willpower). When considering getting up early to exercise they may make a picture in their mind of themselves looking slim and fit or imagine how good they will feel when they have finished (or how bad if they don't get up). Less effective people focus on how good it feels in bed!

So what can you do if you're not managing this very well?

"Don't wait until the whole project is completed before you allow yourself to feel good"

It helps if you have worked out what you want from life and the rules you want to play by (your values). This gives a framework for defining the behaviours which are naturally reinforcing for you or which you want to learn to reinforce deliberately. See our Coaching Tool Kit for help with this.

It is also worth being aware of any options which have been closed off by previous negative consequences which no longer apply (for example if you have any phobias such as of public speaking) and getting help with these.

Specific straightforward actions you can take on your own include:

Do the nastiest things on your list first

If you start with the nicest thing, the only reinforcement you get for finishing it is the joy of moving on to something less pleasant. If you start with the least pleasant task, you get a natural reinforcement when you are able to move on to the next task (which is less unpleasant). Phone the nasty client first!

Break things into small chunks

Work out the first step. If it's really hard to start, just do ten minutes and then give yourself some sort of reinforcement like a short break. Don't wait until the whole project is completed before you allow yourself to feel good.

The absolute hardest thing can be getting started. Often when we do finally get started, we then force ourselves to keep going for hours and hours. We have therefore not reinforced starting and it will be even harder next time. Do a bit and then have a break you've trained your unconscious mind to find starting easier next time.

Notice the things you say to yourself

Are there any particularly unhelpful ones "You'll get it wrong, you'll look stupid . . ."? Challenge them! How much does it matter even if you do look stupid?

For much more help with this, see our Coaching E-Book.