DECISION MAKING COACHING EXERCISE: TIME TRAVELLING CHAIRS

Complex decisions can overwhelm our conscious minds

This is a great exercise for when you have a difficult, personal decision to make, especially one involving lots of factors. People often find it helps with decisions like changing jobs or careers or leaving relationships.

This exercise helps tap into the sophisticated decision making abilities of the unconscious mind.

These kind of decisions sometimes overwhelm our conscious decision making processes, leaving us feeling paralysed. This exercise helps tap into the sophisticated decision making abilities of the unconscious mind.

You can also use this exercise to help motivate yourself to make a decision which you know is best for you (like giving up smoking).

This is a simplified version of the full exercise. If you would like full details or would like us to help you with the exercise, contact us.

Setting up the Exercise

First find three chairs and sit on one of them. Arrange the others so they are facing you and are a few feet away.

Think about your options. It's best to stick to two main scenarios. For example, staying in your present job or changing jobs.

Next, imagine one possible future self on one of the chairs

Look at the first chair and imagine yourself sitting in the chair, as you will be in five years' time. This will be your future self if you decide to go for the first scenario. If there is a status quo, use the first chair for this. So if you're thinking about changing jobs, this chair would have you in five years if you stay in your present job. If you're thinking about deciding to give up smoking, the first chair would contain you in five years' time having not made that decision, and still a smoker.

You may be surprised at what your imagination projects onto the chairs

If you're trying to make a decision and it's not clear which way is best for you, allow yourself to imagine the best scenario you can for each option. (In contrast, If you're using this to help you give up smoking or lose weight, imagine a wheezing, obese monster on the first chair!)

To explain this, I'll use the example of myself considering the difficult decision of giving up being a patent attorney to become a coach.

I looked at one of the chairs and imagined my future self still a patent attorney, sitting in the chair. Consciously I thought that was a reasonable option. Being a patent attorney is a great job and one I used to enjoy. However it was no longer as fulfilling for me as it once was. My mind projected an image of a rather haggard looking person who appeared stressed and fed up with life. Oh dear.

This is a chance to let your imagination run free. Just go with whatever pops into your head. You may be surprised at what your imagination projects onto the chairs. For me the image was surprisingly unappealing!

Spend a few minutes enriching this image and contemplating it, before moving on.

Imagine the alternative future self on the other chair

Now move on to the other chair and imagine your future self if you make the opposite decision.

In my case, at this time I didn't have a very clear idea of my alternative future in coaching, but I was still able to imagine the future me (and she looked a lot healthier and happier than the patent attorney one.) Being a partner in a firm of patent attorneys is a great position to be in, and all logical, sensible advice would be to stay in this position. But my unconscious mind was telling me my enthusiasm and passion had moved elsewhere.

Go and sit in the compelling future's chair

Once both images are clear, you usually get a strong feeling as to which of these alternative futures is more compelling. You then go and sit in that future's chair. Imagine that you are your future self looking back in time to your present self and give him or her advice as to how he/she can become the desired future you.

If you want something enough, you can make it happen!

It sounds strange on paper but it's easier in practice.

My future self told my younger self to go for it! I'm now incredibly grateful to that younger self for following the older self's advice and being so brave.

You obviously don't make a huge decision like changing your career just on the basis of this exercise. You need to consider a lot of sensible, logical factors as well. For me this was just a small part of a very difficult and stressful process. But it is a good way of getting an idea of what you really want in your heart. And if you're a capable person and you want something enough, you can probably make it happen.

For more help with setting goals and working out your values, download the Coaching E-Book and take advantage of the free coaching session available when you complete it.