A Templeton Finn Coaching Article:

WHY DOES COACHING WORK?

Unconscious blocks and blind spots

Is your desire for perfection sabotaging your efforts at finding quick, pragmatic business decisions in areas where there is no right answer?

We all have our own patterns of thinking that are so natural to us that we are not even aware of them (like the fish being unaware of water).

Often your particular ways of thinking have worked well for you in the past and have helped you achieve the success you have today.

Like most successful people, you are probably 'driven' - perhaps by winning, 'being perfect' or pleasing others. If these or other ways of thinking usually get you where you need to go, your unconscious mind will cling to them tenaciously.

But sometimes your normal ways of thinking don't work so well.

What happens if you encounter a new situation in which your 'second nature' ways of thinking are no longer serving you well?

• Maybe you no longer enjoy your job. What's changed?
• Are you 'looking over your shoulder' - suspecting you will soon be "found out"?
• Could your own urge to 'win' be influencing your success in dealing with staff conflicts?
• And that 'desire for perfection' - the characteristic which serves you and your partners so well in your professional work - could it be sabotaging your efforts at finding quick, pragmatic business decisions in areas where there is no right answer?

Coaching helps raise your awareness so you can see what is going on.

Often just the awareness is enough to allow you to change your thinking so you can use your perfectionism (for example) when it serves you but not when it is spoiling your life and limiting your ability to manage and delegate.

Sometimes awareness is not enough, and your coach can help you use Neuro Linguistic Programming ("NLP") techniques to "re-program" your brain so it works better for you.

So, you can change the beliefs and ways of thinking that keep you from your full potential.

You don't really want to do it

If you don't really want to do all those things on your To Do List, your brain may be aiding and abetting you by causing you to procrastinate.

For one of our clients, this happened when the large company she worked for required her to use bullying tactics on a smaller company with whom they were in conflict. That created such a conflict with her values that she unwittingly used procrastination as a defensive mechanism - no wonder she could never find the time to draft the proposed contract.

What is most important to you?

Itis important to work out the reasons why you are not getting things done rather than simply using time management techniques to bulldoze your way through your work.

If you keep suppressing your values, you may feel increasingly empty and dissatisfied.

Core Values

A coach can help you identify your core values and what you need to get from your work in order to be fulfilled.

You may realize that you have to carry out a task like the one above in order to keep your job and support your family, which is even more important to you than fairness.

However being aware of the conflict and the reasons for your procrastination allows you to take control and make a conscious decision about what is most important to you, allowing you to feel at ease with yourself.

Not everyone needs to feel they are changing the world but we all have things which matter to us and which we need to respect. Once your actions are in line with your values, they will start to feel easy and fun.

So, you make sure you are working on things that really matter and will give you long term fulfillment.

Accountability and long term thinking

If your whole working life is spent firefighting, you may eventually start to feel increasingly desperate and out of control.

There's nothing like a deadline to fire you into action.

Unfortunately many of the most important things in life don't have deadlines. So responding to the urgent demands of clients and colleagues often takes precedence over making a business plan, spending time with family or friends and taking care of your health.

At its extreme this can get you into a situation where you are constantly firefighting. You don't spend the ten minutes today that could save you half an hour next week and two hours the week after.

Often there are times when urgent client work does have to take precedence over everything else, and a coach who has worked as a professional will understand that. However if your whole working life is lived that way, you may eventually start to feel increasingly desperate and out of control.

Knowing your coach will be calling to ask how you are getting on with your agreed actions will help you do the things which matter rather than be bullied by other people. (You know the things your coach is calling about are real priorities because you took the time to establish this together.)

So, you think bigger, take action and get the job done, because you are accountable to your coach.

Time and Space

It's amazing how clear your thinking becomes when you are not being judged.

Normally in every conversation with another person, you are being judged and the other person has their own agenda. You don't share your dreams and fears with a colleague because your dreams are likely to be shot down in flames and your fears may be exploited. Even the most well meaning friends and family members will probably tell you what they think you should be doing.

In a coaching session you can say whatever you want. Your coach puts their personal agenda aside and allows you to explore your real feelings, think aloud and say crazy things which then provoke good ideas. It's amazing how clear your thinking becomes when you are not being judged.

In short, you get time to think. You will be surprised by the results!